Bonus!

Today was not as hard as it has been at work. We were 'slow' meaning there was a space of time when not every table was occupied. For the first time in I don't know how long, I got to sit in the dining room to eat.
We got a steam table for the line today... which frees up a lot of space for the cook. He's been keeping stuff hot on the grill, which makes it infuriatingly frustrating for him when cooking people's orders.
He will soon have the entire grill free for just cooking orders. which will mean a shorter wait time for customers, which means more customers in/out/in/out.
I'm supposed to get my dishwasher Wednesday... we're really moving up. I heard my boss say that business had 'doubled or tripled' since we opened.
My boss gave me a grocery bag full of paperbacks.. the kind I like.. mystery/crime. And when I was getting paid he handed me five twenties. And said it was a bonus.
And I hugged him.
What a nice bonus!!!
He said "thanks for all your hard work around here".
So that was very nice.
Then I went to a meeting which was a good one. And then I went to the grocery store and got a few things, not much.. because ...
Shopping makes me SAD. I get so sad in the grocery store, shopping for food. I hate it.
Shopping makes me think of all the places I've lived, all the food stores I've called 'my' grocery store... and all the stuff I bought to make dinner for my partner.
and so I walk the aisles trying to 'get it up' for buying food. And I end up with a few cans of this and that and some coffee creamer.
*SIGH*
After meeting that new friend, I've been more lonely than ever before. Not that we hit it off to such a great extent, but that we didn't. How I long for someone to "HIT IT OFF" with.
NOT 'hit it' but just... get along, have FUN, not be self-conscious... good grief, life is so hard without someone close to you to just be yourself with.
She sent an e-mail saying if I changed my mind I'm welcome out there for turkey day... but tonight I signed up for the ten to noon slot at the fellowship hall.
That will keep me busy.
That, and walking my sister's dogs for four days.
I think she has a cat living there too.....I"m looking forward to having a printer available to me and cable tv.
Not looking forward to being cooped up in that little place sleeping on the couch but hey... it's the least I can do since she took me in when I was down and out, right?
Some guy at the meeting told me about this great bonfire they have near Orleans street in New Orleans... on New Years' Eve...
He showed me a photo of it on his phone. MUST GO SEE that if I actually make it to N.O. for new years...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NRY-3u1rkk4