GIT 'R DUN

Hokay. So. I was driving to work this morning and as I got within a mile and a half I noticed the power was out. No street signals, no buildings have lights. Traffic is flowing though, people are doing the four-way stop at intersections so there were no wrecks to hold me up, all was well.... I got to work and of course the power was out there too. The crew is living it up. I decide to eat (gas grill), cook myself a couple eggs and two strips of bacon, and the biscuits are still warm...as is the coffee. So I have a good sit-down breakfast (it's rare I get to sit down and eat at work) and then I start washing dishes by flashlight while the others call me McGuyver and stand around smoking.
'Bout then the power comes back on and off we go. We're about forty five minutes behind, just enough to put us behind the eight ball so we're scrambling (pardon the pun).
But we get through it ok. Still, it's raining and I'm wondering if I'll get my bed moved... I get a voicemail from my brother saying he'll meet me at my house at four or four fifteen to pick up the mattress.
Well... as I drive home, the day has become delightful. The rain has stopped, the sun is out, partially.
But my brother, he doesn't show up. I leave messages upon messages, I finally give up and sit down and tweet angrily a few times and then I start playing 'Tower Defense' games. He calls about six something saying he's sorry, but he was out in his new garage tinkering around, and lost track of time. I asked him if he still wanted to help me move my bed and he said yeah...since it's supposed to rain/snow/whatever tomorrow.
So.. I'm sitting with my laptop on my lap writing my mom and my roommate says "Your brother's here" and I go upstairs and he's not in the house, and my roommate says "He's out there tightening the motorcycle chain". Well, bless his heart, he had said he would do it before I moved and he did it. So my roommate that is in jail has something to look forward to now, she can ride her motorcycle when she gets out.
By the time he finished that, it was good and dark. I showed him where we were going to on google maps. And I showed him the street view. He was all amazed and I told him you can see my old car parked in my old driveway up in Alaska so I showed him that street view too, but the thing is, he didn't realize that google took those photos two years ago. He asked me if I could go up and get that car, since it was still parked in the driveway. LoL.
I explained to him that google sends out these cars to take street-view photos and they put them together in a montage but they only do it once and don't change it. Then he asked who google paid to do that job. He thought it would be a super job. He wondered what kind of rig you put on the car. I showed him the google fleet of Chevys. He thought that was amazing too.
So then finally I show him the satellite view of my new abode and he says "there is a car in the backyard" and again I have to explain to him the photo was taken a long time ago and he had to believe me, there is no car there now.
Finally we get the bed loaded onto the truck, and my two chests of drawers. We get over to the new place and... the box springs will NOT fit up the stairwell. It's a duplex that used to be a house, and they've made this steep as fuck stairwell, and ...you can't get a full boxspring up there no matter how hard you try, not even if you move the refridgerator and everything on it and around it.
*sigh*
So... we put the mattress up stairs, and the chests of drawers, and... we took the boxsprings to my work. To the dumpster. I will have to break that fucker up and put it in the dumpster tomorrow after work, because what the hell else can I do with a totally decrepit boxspring?
So, my brother and I, curious as to how my new roommate got HER bed up the stairs, looked in her room.
She has a mattress on a futon frame.
*sigh*
I'll start off giving her the benefit of the doubt and say she didn't know a boxspring wouldn't fit up there, because she had a futon frame and a mattress. I'm laid back enough that it's not going to ruffle my feathers looking for a new way to make a bed go up there.
I looked on Craigslist and found a futon frame & mattress for 75 dollars... maybe they'll get back to me and it will still be for sale.
So my roommmate just texted me saying that if it's an eight inch or more futon she will buy the mattress from me and I can put my bed mattress on the futon frame upstairs.
Well.. getting back to my brother, on the way home he asked me if he had told me about the girl he was talking to by email.
I have NEVER heard him say one word about a female in my memory. I have never seen him with a woman, I have never heard him talk about one. So he tells me this story>
Apparently twenty years ago he met this woman. He really liked her and she liked him but she was married. Turns out the husband was beating on her.
So my brother and she had an affair. (I'm astonished, sitting there listening to this, since I have never known him to so much go on a date.) Well. Husband and brother duke it out at one point. My brother beats the shit out of husdband for beating on his wife. Husband hits brother with a baseball bat, knocking him out. Brother comes to and sees husband with a gun.
AT which point brother gets in car and slowly and carefully leaves, saying goodbye to the woman and the husband.
Husband dies a year later. Woman remarries. Woman divorces that guy after a year or so. Remarries soon.
NOW, woman is in touch with my brother, and they are having an e-mail and phone affair, all these years later, my brother asking her why she didn't hook up with him back then, when she said she would marry him.
And her, hemming and hawing and saying that when her son is eighteen (in a year) she will probably leave her current husband and hook up with my brother.
But they have to keep their current e-mail and phone affair hush-hush, he tells me.
I'm sitting there listening and being the good sister by listening and nodding and such, but I'm flabbergasted.
What a mess.
But I have to give my brother kudos for trying every angle . We never did get that boxspring up those stairs, it wasn't going to happen, no way, no how, and I KNEW that, but he kept saying "There are ways, there are tricks, you know?"
What a damned trip. All I got is a mattress on a floor, well, that's something.
I had such a nice bed. yeah the boxspring was tattered looking but it worked fine and my bed was all nice.
I got a new comforter and new shams and such... got a nice new metal bedframe.
WEll... hell. Now I gotta go put it on Craigslist
*sigh again*