I know what I need

What I need is to be in a more open-minded setting. I have got to nourish my own soul, and to do that I have to be able to be myself. To be myself I will need to either MOVE or develop friendships that fall into the open-minded category.
 Was talking to CL#3 on the phone last night and she told me she was 'not religious, per se'... See ...that is the thing right there. Poor thing has been in the south so long she feels the need to predicate her opening statement on religion with a disclaimer.
 The Per Se is her way of inching in to a disastrous  delicate subject.  I told her I believed in 'The Force'. I'm not sure HOW that went over with her because she sort of just kept talking.
 I'm glad she's spiritual and not religious, I can get behind that, since I have my HP, my higher power I call the Force in private.  The Force is only with me when I ask for guidance. I forget to ask, I get hit-and - miss guidance. It's that simple. Praying to The Force is just learning to center oneself.  That I have to pray out loud to my HP is a signal that I believe something outside of me is meddling in my life.
 I dont know, it's just that in AA we are bound by desperation to believe in a power greater than ourselves. And it does work, believing in HP. I better stick with that, as the alternative is ...disastrous.
 At any rate, CL#3 and I are meeting for coffee later on, probably at Books-A-Million.
 "Hey, meet me at BAM!"  Too bad it's not named 'Books-A-Million-Acres' , then we could call it BAMA.
 *groan*
I laughed pretty hard when I heard that people were putting a 'G' in front of  'Obama'...  Haha, you lost. Yeah it was a waste of time, getting out and voting for Obama in this state but it was symbolic and I'm glad I did.
 And I got one of those nifty "YES WE DID" stickers to put on my car.
 I need to be in a big city and I need to be able to get out and be myself with people instead of always always hiding myself ; I'm already suspect just not wearing makeup. I already cringe just going to the women's bathroom.
 Completely nix the idea I could meet and hang out with people LIKE me that AREN'T rabid Christians or that frown on me for my pagan beliefs. I'm so sick of this backwoods town I could puke but hey... I have a hard lesson to learn here. I'm paying off all my bills, and they are sending me back to school. I have got to stay put a while.
 Need to be more centered, need to get a place of my own where I can dance to my tunes and play my trumpet and talk to myself and ...be myself. That will come...
 that will come.
My sponsor was not feeling well the last few days... I hope she is ok. I talked to her briefly yesterday morning and will call her later on today.